I didnt know leaving would be so hard.

This entry is going to be a detailed one about everything that happened.

Thursday night, my whole family, except for my brother, went for dinner and then, to the airport. We were there quite early and so, sat around drinking coffee.

After that, ct and clarence came. Almost at the same time as diya and carrie. Thank you guys! Much love.

Anyway, two hours before, I decided to check in my luggages... I didn't know leaving would be so hard. Whole family's tear gland started running! Even dad's. Makes me feel so sad that I am leaving them behind... But I knew I had to be strong.

Proceeded to chatting non-stop among everyone. Soon, it was time for departure. Took photos and said my goodbyes. Mostly wanted to sprint inside to avoid more tears running down anyone's cheeks. Seriously considered just giving the money and break my bond but I pushed the thoughts out of my head. I rushed through the departure hall. I wanted to leave happy, and land happy.

My flight was 7:40hours but it felt like forever. I was sitting between two caucasians who were snoring away. Kept needing to pee but I couldn't. When images of my family crying appeared into my head, I kept tearing! Watched Marley and Me and the dog just reminds me of snowball, snowman and girl girl. I haven't said my proper goodbyes to them. :(

It was 5:10am when I landed. Everyone was so friendly and helpful. Went to my apartment... It was perfect. Well, it is enough for I spent my whole day unpacking, and stopping for naps in between, since I didn't sleep a wink throughout the flight.

Today morning, I stepped out into the city for the first time. It is indeed the city of dust. There were dusts everywhere due to the dessert. You can say it's sand. There were huge spaces without buildings. Not what we see in Singapore.

I got my blackberry and got connected to my life in Singapore! Missed everyone.

Many timed there were thoughts of giving this up, but only for my family and love. It gets harder when I receive sad and depressed smses from them. I don't want them to suffer too much.

But this is what I want to try out. Why is it that I am not even a little scared? I go to the mall alone and see people wearing cloth covering their bodies. It is not like the skimpy outfits we see in Singapore. Its strict as its a muslim country. But I'm not afraid at all.

I feel as if God has sent me here to become strong and independent, and know what its like to work hard for something. I need to be able to handle negative feelings... All my life I've everything I want and I'm always happy and brave.

Maybe its time I grow up and face something challenging? To learn not to give up because success takes hard work? I want to find that thing that gives my life purpose, no matter what.

We shall see what the future awaits. :)

This is it!

I'm leaving tomorrow night.

A mixture of sadness and excitement. I think I will never know what to expect until I get there.

This isn't an easy dream, but I've come thus far. It will only get tougher from here... But I think it would be all worth it at the end of the day.

I Love You by Ozaki Yutaka

He passed on when he was 26. It was 1992.

He is my dream.

Translation of the song:

I love you
just for now, I don't want to hear sad songs
I love you
escaping and escaping, I finally got to this room

this isn't a love where I was forgiven for everything
the two of us are like abandoned cats
this room is like an empty box, covered in fallen leaves
so you, with a crying voice like a kitten's...

on this creaking bed, instead of holding gentleness
if we can hold each other tightly
and then we'll close our eyes again
with a sad song, for this love not to fade

I love you
the two of us, who are too young
there's an untouchable secret in our love
I love you
I can't arrive at that, in my life right now

the love that piles up and lives on as one
we're only seeing a dream and being hurt
hearing "I love you" over and over,
you can't even go on living without this love

The Beauty Elements

I like this photo.

精彩的人生

這次來台北本來是想一個人在國外好好想一想接下來的生活該怎麽打算，卻不知不覺認識了太多朋友。大多都是宿舍的住宿還有主人；有台灣人，美國人，香港人和法國人。而加上我這個新加坡人，我們到底是怎麽相處愉快的呢？我也不知道。我們大多時間都在廚房看電視，聊天（真的什麽都聊的上）和聼某某台灣人的恐怖大笑聲（這是内笑話）。

住在我房間隔壁的是一位美國人。他帶著剩下在他生命裏的三帶包子（其它的已經在美國賣掉了）來到台灣，除了定了飛機票和宿舍的單人房以外，什麽都沒有策劃。他住在洛杉磯《Los Angeles》一大半輩子，也試過很多不同的工作。他告訴我，大概十年前他還參加過一個巨大的音樂會，是男主角，而且扮演的是Elvis Presley。他給我聼了他那時Live錄的音樂，好厲害，因爲真的很像！過了這麽精彩的人生之後，因爲對華人的習俗非常感興趣，所以決定來台灣認識我們的文化，進步中文（他的中文蠻厲害的！），還有教英文。短短的一個星期内，他找到了房子和工作，就搬走了。

在台北的最後一天，我一整晚沒睡，都在用電腦。早上十點就洗澡，換了衣服就到對面的麥儅勞買早餐吃。我拿著早餐，坐在Tommy Hilfiger的小階梯外面吃著吃著。。。空氣清鮮，能看一個個的Scooter駕過，感覺真的很好。後來，我看到在掃地的Uncle，突然想起前幾天看的電影《Sumimasen，I Love You》裏一個非常感人的一幕。是這樣的。男主角把女主角帶到自己婆婆的小店，而小店在偏避的小巷子裏。店牌上放上店第一年開始的年份（1950年），所以女主角就問阿嫲從幾嵗開始做這個生意的。阿嫲說：“18 嵗的時候。”竟然已經做了58年了！女主角便很感動地說：“阿嫲好厲害哦，可以一輩子這樣專心做一件事情。”女主角便看看周圍的店，每閒都是拉下鐵門的，所以好奇地問男主角爲什麽大家這麽早就関擋了，男主角就回答說：“不是関擋，是都搬走了。” “爲什麽？” “因爲沒有一個人可以像阿嫲一樣一輩子只專心做一件事啊！”看了這部分真的好感動。。。好喜歡那部片子哦！

我在台灣的十天就差不多這樣了。睡得飽飽地，到樓下吃一點熱鍋之類的，在師大的某個小咖啡館坐一兩個小時，或回到宿舍的廚房聼聼人家的故事。
最後，在我回新加坡前，和宿舍的朋友聊一聊。她告訴我她曾經窮到需要到超級市場幫人切菜，甚至駕大卡車去送貨，一個女孩子需要缸大約二十公斤的菜和水，還要被每個人，包括家人和朋友，瞧不起。但她也覺得，就因爲自己熬過來了，就因爲曾經有這樣痛苦的經歷，才覺得人生有真正活得精彩過。

這讓我開始想。。。到底怎麽樣的生活才算精彩？難道像電影裏的阿嫲一樣，一輩子只專注做一件事，就不精彩了嗎？這讓我發現，人生真的有無限的可能，有太多聼不完的故事，而每個人都有選擇過自己想要過的人生。每個平凡的人，平凡的人生，都是精彩的。

隨意妹妹

This was what I wrote after returning from Taiwan. I find it really hilarious. Don't laugh at my mandarin!

Cruz - Christina Aguilera

I'm leavin today
Living it, leaving it to change

Slowly drifting into a peaceful breeze
Tounge tied and twisted are all my memories
Celebrating a fantasy come true
Packing all my bags
Finally on the move

I'm leavin today
I'm living it, I'm leaving it to change

As I'm driving, I'm captured by the view
So much beauty, the road becomes my muse
The heat is rising, and my hand surfs through the wind
Cool, calm, collective is the child that lies within

See I'm leavin today
I'm living it, oh I'm leaving it to change
See I believe in today
Oh yes, I'm living it, I'm leaving it to change
But somehow I'll miss it
I think I'll really miss it, one day, ooh!

I turn up the radio
And I'm feeling like Ive never felt before
Turn down the memories of yesteryears and broken dreams
I bring, finally free(Ooo)

Slowly drifting into a peaceful breeze...
Oh yeah!mmmm

I'm leavin today
Oh yes, I'm living it(oh yeah), leaving it to change(to change)
Oh no, see I believe in today(oh yes)
I'm living it(living it)
Leaving to change(ohhh)
I'm leavin today
Living it, leaving to change
Living(to change), leaving to change(oh yeah)
Living it, leaving it
Said I'm living it, I'm leaving it
Living it, leaving it to change
I'm leaving it to change
But somehow I'll miss it, I think I'll really miss it one day

My siblings and me

Sex and the City 2

OMG, SO EXCITING! Makes me want to watch Sex and the City all over again.

My new love

My new love! It's really tiny and pretty. Bought it for the convenience of travelling in future! Love love love love love... It's only 1.12kg!

Marc Jacobs 2009

These were out way before but I really love those bags...

& these heels. :D

Spring/Summer/Autumn/Winter Clothing

Spring

Summer

Autumn

Winter

Carrie Bradshaw

I'm a hardcore fan of Sex and the City. Carrie Bradshaw is like an ICON. She'll always be.

Anyway, people always say that Carrie has a very unique sense of style.

This is the classic Carrie Bradshaw dress.

But seriously this is terrible:

The belt is funny:

This was when she went over to nurse Mr.Big & when he 'opened' his heart for the first time! Awwww. (Yes, I already memorised all the scenes.)

The super extravagant dress she wore while waiting for her OLD boyfriend alexandra to come back to the hotel:

Her looks while roaming around Paris:

& Seriously I LOVE it when Carrie smokes, I think she looks totally iconic & cool. The funniest thing is she always tries to smoke in inappropriate places: like EVERYWHERE.

Can't find any other photos of her smoking. ):

She always loved the show-off-belly look. But she's really skinny so yah.

Last but not least, AWWW her wedding dress.

PLEASE LOOK AT THE SHOES.

Can't wait for Sex and the City 2!

Boots + Dresses

I know this is nothing new but I'm suddenly in love with the whole combination of boots and dresses! They look so nice together. Too bad I can't really wear them in SG because it's weird. I'll definitely try them when I travel next time!

Sophia's wedding

Just came back from cousin Sophia's wedding. It was quite sweet! Wish you guys all the best! These are the few pathetic photos I managed to take with my iPhone.

I love Teh Wei Ping ♥!

21st Birthday Celebration

And so I celebrated my birthday with lots of activities packed with BF! Here are some photos. :)

The Chevron House.

Jurong Swimming Complex...

Lake at Lakeside.

民歌餐廳

The singer kept talking to me because we were sitting in front. Awkward! LOL

I had a great time. :) Thank you for everything.

Came home & chatted with mum after our short-lived fight. Heart to heart talk. Haha.

I'm so hungry now, gonna get some food. Bye!